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Remember that question from the Joker from the movie The Dark Knight? The Joker always asked Why so serious? While the seriousness that he caused was rather gruesome, the CPA can cause the same sentiment but for vastly different reasons. Why, indeed, are you so serious?

 

Dont get me wrong, getting the license is of great iimportance but as CPA candidates and working professionals, we must have a sense of humor and laugh alil and not be so serious. At least that’s what I believe as I find laughter as a stress reliever. I also previously bloggedabout how we need to give our brain some downtime to recover and process what we study (Tip #4: Take Breaks and Give Your Brain Some Downtime). In accordance with this tip and the added benefit of humor being a stress reliever, here are some accounting jokes with the website source giving so you may also browse these sites for more jokes. Remember, take breaks, relax, and laugh alil. You dont want people around you asking you too often...why so serious? So to minizime such seriousness, here are the jokes...hope enjoy them!

 

Joke 1

 

Accountants do not die, they get derecognized.

 

Source: http://www.workjoke.com/accountants-jokes.html

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Source for Jokes 2 & 3: http://www.accountantslike.com/2011/01/accounting-jokes.html

 

Joke 2

Q: If an accountant's wife can't get to sleep, what does she do?
A: Leans over to her husband and says "Tell me about work today, honey."

 

Joke 3: Our own pearly gates story

An accountant dies and goes to heaven (no, that's not the joke). St. Peter, of course, is there, looking through the files and asking a few quick questions. "What sort of accountant were you?" "Oh, I was a CPA", was the reply. "Name?" asks St. Pete. The accountant gives his name and St. Peter finds his file. "Oh yes, we've been expecting you. You've reached your allotted time span." The accountant says, "I don't get it. How can that be? I'm only 48 years old." Pete looks again at the file and says, "Well, that's impossible." "Why do you say that?" asks the accountant. "Well," says St. Peter, "we've been looking over your time sheets and the hours you've charged your clients. By our reckoning, you must be at least 93 years old!"

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Source for Jokes 4-6 (5 & 6 may be from David Letterman as the website credits him): http://www.groco.com/readingroom/humor.aspx

 

Joke 4: Genie in a Lamp

 

A man was walking along a beach when he found a lamp. Upon rubbing the lamp a genie appeared who stated "I am the most powerful genie in the world. Because I am so powerful, I can grant you any wish you want, but only one wish.

The man pulled out a map of the Mediterranean area and said "I'd like there to be peace among the people in the middle east."

The genie responded, "Gee, I don't know. Those people have been fighting since the beginning of time. They are always going to be fighting. I can do just about anything, but this is beyond my limits."

The man then said, "Well, my staff is switching to Excel. I wonder if you could teach them this VBA thing."

Genie: "Uh, let me see that map again."

 

Joke 5: Top 10 Pick-Up Lines of Accountants - ©David Letterman

10."You've got a lovely pair of W-2's."
9."Please, baby, let me withhold you."
8."Technically, having sex with me is a charitable gift."
7."In my office, 'I.R.S.' stands for 'I'm really sexy.' "
6."If I help you screw Uncle Sam, can I be next?"
5."You're entitled to a $5,000 tax break on your municipal bond income...now let's do it."
4."Let's fill out a 1040 -- you're a 10, and I'm 40."
3."You're the kind of girl I could take home to mother - which is good, since I still live with her."
2."Lady, you make my pants file for an extension."
1."Nice assets."

 

Joke 6: Top 10 Ways To Make Doing Your Taxes More Fun- © David Letterman

10. Do 'em naked.
9. Instead of a restaurant receipt, send them leftovers from the meal in question.
8. Frequent use of the word "eleventeen."
7. Claim a deduction, do a shot!
6. In "For Office Use Only" area write "Approved. Send refund immediately."
5. Apply a long-term capital gain rate of 20% to a mutual fund, do a shot!
4. Sneeze on forms.
3. Instead of using dated definition of income, use the proposed revised definition under section 643(B) in which conforming amendments are made to regulations affecting ordinary trusts, pooled income funds, charitable remainder trusts, trusts that qualify for the gift and estate tax marital deduction, and trusts that are exempt from generation-skipping transfer taxes -- that always puts a smile on my face.
2. Deduct $100 in medical expenses for all the paper cuts you suffered because tax form is 75 damn pages long!
1. Audit yourself, if you know what I mean.

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Source: http://www.j-walk.com/ss/jokes/car.htm

 

Joke 7: If Excel Were a Car...

  • It would crash two or three times per day for no apparent reason. The driver is often hurt, but the car itself receives no permanent damage. You'd just accept this fact, restart the car, and begin your trip again.
  • Occasionally, your car would fail to restart after a crash, and you'd have to reinstall the engine. For some strange reason, you'd just accept this too.
  • You would be forced to buy a new model every 18 months, and your old model would have no resale value. Each new model would be bigger that the previous one, require more gas, and would operate differently. Furthermore, parts from the old car would not be interchangeable with the new car.
  • You could call a special phone number when you had a problem. The phone would be staffed by people who know less about your car than you do.
  • There would be a special Macintosh model, powered by the sun. However, it would only run on 5 percent of the roads and require different driving skills.
  • You would have to spend additional money to buy the operating manuals.
  • The oil, engine, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single warning light: "This car has performed an illegal operation."
  • Before engaging, the airbag system would display a message, "Are you sure?"
  • Every time you looked under the hood, an obnoxious cartoon character would appear and ask if you need help. No matter how many time you refused help, it would keep appearing.
  • A special feature would let you automatically record the route for  a particular trip, so you could repeat the trip automatically later on. However, after repeating the trip you always end up at a different location.

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